Square-Enix has talent and a heavily lobotomized fanbase.

First off… FInal Fantasy 13 is nothing special.  A great game… Probably… Memorable? Possibly.  Time will tell.

What was their last absolute smash packed jam hit?  Probably Final Fantasy X.   Though I don’t see what the fuss is about with that one.  It is a good game… but you can put lipstick on any shitty game… call it Final Fantasy and SOMEBODY will treat it like gold dookie.

Say what you want about every single lackluster effort since FFX… One thing is undeniable.

Square-Enix are colossal, arrogant, dimwitted … douchebags.

They’ve managed to repackage Chrono Trigger twice, countless final fantasy games and a whole slew of other shit gamers didn’t know they wanted till they saw “Squaresoft” / “Square-Enix” branded on the front/side.

But now that PSN is doing it kinda big with putting PSX games on PSN – You’d think the supreme lords of double and triple dipping (They beat Konami AND Capcom) would have more than just a few FF titles online.

Recently they’ve discussed putting FF9 on PSN… They actually had to discuss this.  This is how they are spending your FF13 money.  They had to propose something that is a no brainer. 

Confused?

Final Fantasy 7 is on PSN… around a year later… Final Fantasy 8 hits PSN… Both are considered successes…  So after a while, some lightbulb goes off in a SE employees head and thinks “Wait a sec.. Didn’t FF9 come out 10 years ago?  OOOH 10 year anniversary” ….

NOBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT A 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY! Its not that memorable of a game!~! Just put the fucking game online and charge us 10 bucks for it already. You don’t need to discuss this!!!!!!

You actually called a game… Final Fantasy X-2 … Not Final Fantasy “EX” Two…. Final Fantasy TEN TWO…… Is Yuna fly fishing? Driving? If you wanted to discuss something… it was then!

This is why I have the need to punch you guys in the throat. All of you. 

I’m not fooled by any of this.  Square doesn’t listen to their fans.  They make the games they want to make and KUDOS for doing it.  But if they listened to their fans… You know damn well what you’d be playing

Chrono Trigger 3 or Final Fantasy 7: HD

In conclusion… I look forward to FF 13: Versus as well as Agito (Sp?) because in all honesty… you make playable triple A games 99.9999%… and that’s something I can’t say of most developers with 20+ years in the biz.

But the problem is this… Bioware & Bathesda…  Hell even Level 5 has a more innovative property on their hands.

All I’m saying is that Sq-Enix better revolutionize or evolve the RPG because sooner or later somebody is going to notice that Square-Enix isn't actually *THAT* good.  And you’ll notice some things on that list…

Like Final Fantasy 14… and Final Fantasy 15…  I can’t believe these words haven’t lost all meaning.

After saying there will be a decade of Final Fantasy XIII .. you’re kinda shooting yourselves in the face with buckshot here…

JG

My First Tradition-Now with more Pre-Amble

OH MAN! NPDs ARE OUT!

But before I get into that goodness I’d like to say that I’m *NOT* a fanboy.  My loyalty has jumped ship and has officially gone back-and-forth between Sony/Microsoft for the last 3 gens. (PSOne ---> Xbox ---> PS3)  I do own a PS2 and I am retroactively playing the games that I missed.  But bottom line… the Xbox smashed the PS2 into oblivion for anything cross-platform.  PS2 won the console war that gen purely as a numbers thing.  The 360 vs. PS3 debate is gonna come down to the same thing.  I give the 360 a lot of respect…  though not openly and frequently because I’m not retarded but … That system is outdated but it just manages to stay relevant and unlock it’s potential more and more.   I’ll get into what I actually like about the 360 later … but back it up a little to the console war being about numbers. . . .

National Product Distribution or NPDs… are the numbers of the top 10 whenever (Consoles and Games) … Now if you're new to them GOOD! .. I get to walk you through them.

They always compare last month to the month before.  So.. Here are the Consoles. You’ll learn very fast that outselling the Wii and DS is impossible and I don’t know why we bother comparing these numbers.

December 2009 Hardware Sales

• Wii -- 3,810,000 <--- Add this…
• Nintendo DS -- 3,310,000 <--- To this ... Over 7 million units.
• PlayStation 3 -- 1,360,000 <---- This number used to be half
• Xbox 360 -- 1,310,000 <---- of this one about a year ago. The tide is turning.
• PlayStation Portable -- 654,700 <---- This is considered when compared to their usual 200K-ish.
• PlayStation 2 -- 333,200 <---- Yeah.. they still sell this thing. Sony makes more and more money off this thing because it gets cheaper and cheaper to make but it stays $100

November 2009 Hardware Sales

• Nintendo DS -- 1,700,000 <---- What the PS3 & 360 work so hard for….
• Wii -- 1,260,000 <---- Nintendo does every month.
• Xbox 360 -- 819,500 <---- After trailing the PS3 for 2 months they pulled their sales up.  (They had awesome Black Friday bundles and no matter how you slice it, it’s cheaper than a Wii)
• PlayStation 3 -- 710,400  <----- this is like a 200-300% increase compared to Nov 08
• PlayStation Portable -- 293,900
• PlayStation 2 -- 203,100

Are you still with me?  Games are up next.  I promise I wont do this for every month.  This is me popping my NPD coverage’s cherry.  I hope that doesn’t offend any women.

Anyways… When you read the game sales… Any new *Vogue* Wii game goes on the chart…. and it stays there… and it will be there for a very, very long time. Selling a million units every time..  As a result .. the Wii and DS tend to run the charts.

December 2009 Software Sales

1. New Super Mario Bros (Wii) -- 2,820,000
2. Wii Fit Plus (Wii) -- 2,410,000
3. Wii Sports Resort (Wii) -- 1,790,000
4. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (360) -- 1,630,000 <--- This is good
5. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (PS3) 1,120,000 <---- This is better considering the lack of a decline.
6. Wii Play (Wii) -- 1,010,000
7. Mario Kart Wii (Wii) -- 936,100
8. Assassin's Creed 2 (360) -- 783,100 <--- I hope this hasn’t peaked
9. Left 4 Dead 2 (360) -- 728,500
10. Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story (DS) -- 656,700

November 2009 Software Sales

1. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (360) -- 4,200,000 <--- KA-BOOM!!
2. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (PS3) -- 1,870,000 <--- Bang!
3. New Super Mario Bros. (Wii) -- 1,390,000
4. Assassin's Creed II (360) -- 794,700 <---- Under a million during a launch month worries me..
5. Left 4 Dead 2 (360) -- 744,000
6. Wii Sports Resort (Wii) -- 720,200
7. Wii Fit Plus (Wii) -- 679,000
8. Assassin's Creed II (PS3) -- 448,400
9. Dragon Age: Origins (360) -- 362,100
10. Mario Kart (Wii) -- 315,000

 

And there you have it… Your NPDs… BYE!

1^

Episode 2 - Playing Catch-up

Back with my sophomore effort

PSN ID: IamFN2K
Leave a message “Saw your show” or something like that.

EMAIL: PROJECT-WINGMAN@hotmail.com

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YOU GETTIN A TEASER!



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Actually... Your campaign is kinda... Uhh.. Happy

As if the Homosexual community doesn't feel society's ignorance enough. Now (and for the duration of the history of popular online gaming) they have to deal with constantly hearing the word "gay" being thrown around. Man... That's tough. I can't imagine how that feels.

But as a gamer.. and someone who uses the phrase "That's so gay" from time to time... Let me shed some light on this whole thing. And maybe piss some gasoline on a dying flame...

I'm gonna go out on a limb... and say there is a war brewing between Gays and Gamers. So...Gay Gamers... PICK A SIDE!! THIS IS WAR!

For those who don't know... way back in August, I reported on a waste of tax money ad campaign that wants to.... I dunno.. I think they want to do some sort of reverse psychology that stereotypes Cheerleaders, Jocks and Gamers.

The problem is.... I'm no cheerleader or Jock... but if a gamer is talking about somebody's sexual orientation... it's either Fag or dyke. And even the word "fag" is up for debate but one step at a time... Let's start with Gay.

The problem with this campaign is the fact that you're attacking people who are using the word gay.. in the same way one would say something is "bad" when they mean it is good. Gay used to mean happy or good before it was straight jacked by the homosexual community porchmonkey Clerks II style. So now.. in the modern world where bad means good and SICK means Really good... Gay now means lame or sad. Period. And there isn't a damn thing you can do about it but get used to it.

When a derogatory word is used for nothing but one thing... then complain... I don't wanna sound cold but when a gamer says "don't be gay" or "thats so gay" they aren't talking about homosexuals. So this campaign feels like gamers are being targeted for no reason.

I realize homophobia exists, but out of all the homophobic communities out there. I assure you that your average gamer doesn't give a shit about your sexual orientation (unless you're beating them) even if you're insecure about it.

Hey, I know being gay Homosexual is no picnic and that your community is still feeling the pinch of inequality. That shit sucks. But maybe the focus should be on the issues. Instead of picking a fight with gamers. You don't want to do that. Gamers can and will ruin you. Just ask Cooper Lawrence who simply said something stupid.

So... To the good folks at ThinkB4Youspeak.com your heart is in the right place. But your targets are wrong. And to the good folks at Out.com... you just wanted attention so...
Have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up.

P.S. Your list was hilarious. You had to use the Hubble Telescope to find the gay in 99% of the games you listed. Just like Cooper Lawrence, you ought to try playing them first.

JadedGamer

MyNutsHaveSpoken! Uh-Bitch-Bitch

Take Two made dumber than dumb choices in 09

I don't wanna drag this out because I love their work.  GTA (Italian air kiss) Max Payne (DELISSIOSO!)

Yet... for some flippen reason they are confused as to why their recent efforts to milk what they thought was a cash cow Fell Flat

I'll tell you why...  GTA IV... great game... Replay Value... UGH... I dunno... but its really low.  I beat it twice (2nd time was purely to if I could get the gold for beating it under 30 hours) And I haven't gone back and not even two DLC packs (Which are not even available to me) would get me to go back to a game I played in 2000

The statement goes on to say that between 2010's Red Dead Redemption, Max Payne 3 and BIO-FREAKEN-SHOCK 2... They don't think they can turn a profit.  Ok look.. Your development costs are obviously WAY WAY too high.  Maybe Max Payne wont destroy sales records... But Bioshock 2 should at least help you break even.   I'm going to purchase 2 of the 3 titles mentioned and I'm sure one of them (Max Payne 3) will be OFF THE HOOK!

Back to GTA 4 for a minute.... See.. You thought because you did like 8 million units worldwide that you had a good game on your hands. And you did.  One which ... from beginning to end was an enjoyable ride.  HOWEVER! -- It was just a GTA 3 expansion in HD.  Anything that you added.... was negated by what you removed. (RPG elements from San Andreas, The sheer map size, the girlfriend mechanics, and THE HUMOR) --- So The Lost and The Damned and The Ballad of Gay Tony or whatever it is called may have been worthy ... .They just aren't what GTA players worldwide want to play.   Here... I'll help you... GTA: Cape Disappointment (Which may not work because its a real place)  But go with me... Make it like you're making San Andreas 2...  That way it will be awesome!~! and if nobody plays it, you can say it was in the title and you'll know that gamers are done with GTA for now.

Finally... I take great exception to them acting like they give a shit about GTA on the PSP... That's bullshit and they know it.  ANY and EVERY GTA-PSP owner will tell you.... 1) Fuck Chinatown Wars in the ASS with chalk dust.  2) Where the hell is San Andreas Stories?  -- You wanna turn a profit on a portable system... SAN ANDREAS STORIES!!

You don't get to port a shitty half assed game (by PSP standards) and cry about your failure.

Have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up!

Jaded Gamer

So I totally went with Jaded Gamer's Show...

FINALLY it's done!

There ya go. And Vote in the poll!